


anemoia

by nicojqckson



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: 2jin - Freeform, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst?, Drinking, F/F, Hyunjin is lonely, Slow Burn, Smoking, ah i can't tag, existing but not living hyunjin, fluff?, gifted kid burnout artist heejin, heejin is lonely too, maybe together they can be a little less lonely
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-17
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-26 11:22:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30105210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nicojqckson/pseuds/nicojqckson
Summary: 'heejin’s new theory in life was that everything boiled down into choices. conscious, unconscious, complicated, simple. life, in its purest essence, was a matter of choices. more specifically, everything in life could be boiled down into two choices. whether to get up or stay in bed, whether to drink that third cup of coffee or try and stifle your crippling caffeine addiction. it wasn’t exactly a profound realization, but for some reason, it dramatically changed heejin’s outlook on life. if every facet of her life was controlled by a single choice she had made, would that make the choices matter more or less?'
Relationships: Jeon Heejin/Kim Hyunjin
Kudos: 12





	anemoia

**Author's Note:**

> i'm not 100% what direction this is going in yet, but i hope you enjoy it and leave me any suggestions/opinions :)  
> by the way, the title is the word anemoia, which is pretty much the word for feeling nostalgia for a time that has never existed. it's my favorite word right now, and i feel like it fits the vibe of the story pretty well! :D

heejin’s new theory in life was that everything boiled down into choices. conscious, unconscious, complicated, simple. life, in its purest essence, was a matter of choices. more specifically, everything in life could be boiled down into two choices. whether to get up or stay in bed, whether to drink that third cup of coffee, or try and stifle your crippling caffeine addiction. it wasn’t exactly a profound realization, but for some reason, it dramatically changed heejin’s outlook on life. if every facet of her life was controlled by a single choice she had made, would that make the choices matter more or less? was her most recent choice, to down a second, and soon a third, and possibly a fourth (she couldn’t quite remember at this point,) shot of vodka the right one? was there even such a thing as right and wrong choices? what was the point in making decisions? to better yourself? was the point of bettering yourself bettering your current self or your future self? thinking too much made heejin’s head spin, but in a good way. she liked the way hours could pass by in what felt like seconds, and in the blink of an eye, she’d find that although the sky had shifted its hues, nothing profound had changed. she was still the same person she was before, albeit a few hours older. but thinking made her feel good. she wanted to understand the world around her. she wanted to understand herself. at least once a week, she would carve out some mandatory thinking time. usually, it wound up being a few hours on thursday nights, as fridays were the only day she left devoid of classes. normally, thinking days were also drinking days, because drinking helped her forget all her thinking. counterintuitive, perhaps, but if heejin narrowed down her thinking time to one day a week, she could hold it together for the other six, forcing anything even the least bit contemplative into a box in the back of her mind, a box reserved for thursdays. normally, though, she didn’t drink this much. maybe a shot, maybe two tops. just enough so her head got warm and fuzzy and her feelings dulled and underneath all the emotions she was processing was a familiar glow. but for whatever reason, this week was different. heejin was far past the one to two shot mark, far past the warm fuzzy feeling. the colors behind her eyelids blurred together, painting pictures in the dark. her thoughts were becoming less and less coherent, and the familiar glow rose above the emotions she was trying to process. she didn’t feel sad, she didn’t feel alone, she didn’t feel overwhelmed, she felt warm. while warm wasn’t exactly a synonym for happy, nor an antonym for those less positive emotions, heejin had come to find that it came pretty close. time passed and heejin sat in the corner of the bar, watching people enter and exit, living their silly little lives and thinking their silly little thoughts. people were silly. everything was silly. purpose was silly. thinking was silly. soon enough, her feet are moving on their own, dragging her out of her seat and up to the door of the bar. she left as quietly as she had come in (well, maybe not as quietly seeing as it had become a little harder to move fluidly,) and breathed in the night air. and the scent of rain. normally, heejin loved the rain, but that was when she was inside, reading or drawing or thinking. however, at around three in the morning, away from home, it wasn’t quite the most opportune weather, especially in her current inebriated state. she felt droplets fall across her forehead as she took in the atmosphere of the night. it was relatively quiet, with only a few people milling around the streets. on her left, under a dark green awning, a black-haired girl was smoking a cigarette. to her right, a tall bleach-blond man wearing a smirk and a dark leather jacket, heading in her direction. 

“hey,” he called out as he approached her, “what’s a pretty girl like you doing out here so late?”

“hehe… you think i’m pretty?” heejin slurred, as she felt the man’s arm wrap around her waist. 

“of course i do, gorgeous. why don’t we get you home, hmm?” he said, eyes dripping with lust and grip tightening around heejin’s waist.

heejin, too intoxicated to think clearly, nodded in agreement and relaxed into the stranger’s touch. just as she was about to follow him to god-knows-where, she heard the pretty cigarette-smoking stranger speak.  
“back off, perv,” she said, shoving the man away from heejin. 

“shut the fuck up, slut,” the man exclaimed, pushing the pretty stranger but slinking away nonetheless. 

“am I going home with you now? my name’s heejin!” heejin asked, collapsing into the taller stranger with a smile. 

“uh, i guess? do you know where _you_ live, heejin?” the stranger asked, sliding her hand around heejin’s waist to support her weight, much more gently then the blond man had. 

“i think it starts with a seven. or maybe a six? oh! it’s yellow! wait no, maybe green?” heejin searched the depths of her mind for some description of the apartment in which she currently resided, but every house she had lived in in the twenty years of her existence suddenly blended together in her memory.

“thanks, that’s really helpful,” the stranger responded, sarcasm dripping from her words.

“you’re welcome!” heejin responded, oblivious to the obvious teasing, snuggling deeper into the stranger’s embrace.

the taller girl merely sighed, breathing in heejin’s lavender shampoo and guiding her to her own apartment.

그녀는 나의 샴푸의 요정 / 이제는 너를 사랑할 거야  
_she's my shampoo fairy / i'll love you now_

the pretty stranger sat heejin down on her deep velvet couch, the walk home taking longer than usual as she had to deal with heejin’s constant mumbles of compliments and incessant touches. she untied the smaller girl’s dark red converse and helped her take off her coat before leading heejin into her own bedroom, tucking her in and adamantly denying heejin’s half-asleep pleas to sleep in the bed with her, opting instead to sleep on the couch instead. she sighed as she watched the smaller girl sleep so peacefully, making a cup of tea before falling asleep herself.

**Author's Note:**

> welp that was that :)) this is only the first chapter, hopefully i can get the second one out sooner !! leave me a kudo or a comment, and i hope you're all doing well !! by the way, the lyric is from the song 'fairy of shampoo' by txt, which i listened to a lot while writing.


End file.
